DOING AWAY WITH TRADITION WITHOUT RAISING AN EYEBROW AND BEING PRAISED FOR IT. NOW THAT'S TOUGH! POSSIBLE BUT TOUGH!
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Location: Darjeeling, India

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Men Are From MS, Women Are From Linux

Saturday, December 17, 2005

Before you go on to read my post, I suggest you read this.

For those who don’t want to bother here is the gist of the story:

Rohit, supposedly a techie, proposes a months ‘compatibility’ contract to his bride-to-be, Rohini. If the marriage didn’t work out during the ‘trial run’, then the husband had the right to annul the alliance.

The fact that Rohit works in the software industry has gone too much to his head. Let me elaborate. One usually gets a user-trial version of any software before purchase. If it integrates well into your system and works reasonably well without throwing up cryptic errors, then one can upgrade to the full version for a fee. Now our protagonist here aspires to apply this principle on everything in life. He has so far failed in probably his first attempt.

Rohit! You bungling idiot, women may have soft wares but they are not software. The sooner you realize this, the better.

Rohini! Run away from this man as fast as you can. You don’t gain anything from this pact. He is akin to Windows ME, who promises much but will deliver nothing. Allow me to educate you. Reliability of software is the probability of failure free operation for a specified period of time in a specified environment – which means that it may work sometimes but not always. Replace ‘software’ with ‘marriage’ in the above definition and it fits right in. There will be times when marriage will seem to hang in the balance. When the time comes, he will probably delete you and look for an upgrade or a new version. You won’t be able to keep up with him. It’s not like you have extra expansion slots. You perhaps require a full recovery right now. It is a slow and arduous process, but everything will be all right. Don’t you install him right back in again. Delete him! Delete him! Keep the faith, girl! Someone more reliable will come your way.

Rohit! You stupid nut, how dare you treat her like code. You have completely missed the plot. If I may draw parallels, women are like Linux. Sometimes a tad too cumbersome or incomprehensible but once you get it right, they provide you with loads of fun, security and unconditional free lifetime support. They will even load onto a rickety old machine without dire consequences. Installing it onto your system is complicated at first ofcourse. Sometimes requiring several mountings before you finally get it right. They are difficult to master too. But the advantages of having them far outweigh the demerits.

I hope I have cleared your doubts now, Rohit – unless ofcourse you prefer a Mac, which then is an entirely different story.

For a different perspective on this, you may read this.

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